The Key to Lasting Weight Loss

How many times have you said, “I just want a healthy relationship with food”?

I can tell you, I’ve said it a thousand times, especially when I was tipping the scales at 300 pounds. I felt like I had no control. Food had power over me, and I was trapped in this cycle of guilt, restriction, and then binging, over and over again. It was exhausting.

If you’ve ever felt this way, you’re not alone. You may feel out of control around food, like you can’t trust yourself to make the right choices or stop eating when you’ve had enough. And it’s frustrating because there are so many rules in your head about what you should and shouldn’t eat, yet they don’t seem to help.

Today, I want to share how I finally got myself together around food. And trust me, if you’re trying to lose weight, this is key. You have to get yourself together around food before you can achieve any lasting results.

Having a healthy relationship with food isn’t about the types of food you eat. It’s not about eating more salads or giving up carbs forever. It’s about how and why you eat, what’s going on inside your mind when you’re making those choices.

For a long time, I thought eating healthy just meant following strict rules—cut out sugar, eat more vegetables, and avoid eating after 8 p.m. But no matter how hard I tried, I felt stressed, guilty, and out of control. The moment I messed up, it was all over, and I’d binge on everything in sight.

That’s when I realized it wasn’t the food itself; it was my relationship with it that was the problem.

Here are a few signs that your relationship with food might need some work:

• You feel guilty about eating certain foods, which leads to a cycle of restriction and bingeing.
• You have a long list of rules dictating what you can and can’t eat.
• You rely on external cues—like calorie counting apps or strict meal plans—to tell you what to eat, rather than listening to your body’s hunger and fullness cues.
• You worry about what others think of your eating habits, whether it’s ordering a salad when you really want a burger or skipping dessert in front of friends.

This was me for years. I didn’t trust myself around food, so I clung to these rules, hoping they’d keep me in check. But in reality, they only made me feel more out of control.

One of the hardest things for me to unlearn was the diet industry’s favorite phrase: food is just fuel. It’s drilled into us that food is only about fueling our bodies, like we’re machines or something.

But that’s not true at all! Humans don’t eat just to survive; we eat for joy, pleasure, connection, tradition, and celebration.

Food is woven into every part of our lives, from birthday cakes to holiday feasts. And that’s a good thing.

When you stop seeing food as just fuel, you can start building a relationship that’s emotionally healthier and more fulfilling.

Here’s what a good relationship with food might look like:

• You enjoy the foods you love without feeling guilty about it.
• You eat when you’re hungry and stop when you’ve had enough.
• You don’t feel the need to justify your food choices, to yourself or anyone else.
• You eat a wide variety of foods, including those that make you feel physically and emotionally good.
• You no longer focus on calories but on how food makes you feel.

I know it’s easy to think, “I’ll never get there.” Trust me, I get it. Every single person I’ve worked with comes in with a laundry list of food rules, and it takes time to untangle them all.

But here’s the most important thing I want you to know: none of this is your fault.

If you’re ready to start improving your relationship with food, the first step is awareness. And one of the best ways to practice this is through mindful eating. This is something we work on in the Weight Loss Your Way program because rebuilding your relationship with food is the foundation for losing weight in a way that lasts.

Here’s a simple exercise I want you to try this week:

1. Pick one food you’re afraid of or feel guilty about eating.

2. Set aside a quiet time to eat it, free from distractions.

3. Eat slowly, paying close attention to the taste, texture, and how your hunger and fullness cues change as you eat.

4. Afterward, write down your thoughts. Here are a few questions to consider:

What flavors and textures did you notice that you usually miss?

Did the food satisfy you as much as you expected it to?

Did the food solve any emotional problem like you thought it would?

How did you feel emotionally while eating, and is that how you want to feel?

Your answers might surprise you. Often, we eat mindlessly, hoping food will fix our stress, sadness, or boredom, but it rarely does. The goal here isn’t to criticize yourself but to understand what’s really going on and start breaking those patterns.

In the Weight Loss Your Way program, this is just one tool we use to help you transform your relationship with food. We also have live weekly Q&A calls where women bring their experiences, and we work through them together. You wouldn’t believe how many people are struggling with the same things you are. And when one person finds a solution, we all benefit.

If you can’t make the live calls, don’t worry. They’re saved in our On-Demand library, so you can listen anytime, wherever you are. Plus, you get a monthly private coaching session with me to work through anything that feels particularly hard or confusing. This isn’t just a cookie-cutter group program—we tailor everything to you and your needs.

Rebuilding your relationship with food isn’t easy, and it doesn’t happen all at once. But it is so worth it. It’s the foundation for losing weight in a way that’s sustainable and feels good long-term. No more crash diets, no more obsessing over calories, no more guilt.

It’s about learning to trust yourself again, to recognize that food is not your enemy but something that can nourish both your body and your soul. When you shift how you think about food, the stress melts away, and for the first time, you start to feel at peace.

So if you’re ready to stop the cycle of restriction and bingeing, to finally let go of food guilt, and to lose weight in a way that feels right for you, Weight Loss Your Way is here for you. We’ll work together to untangle the rules, rebuild your relationship with food, and create a path forward that honors your body and your life.

Join me today, and let’s get started on a journey toward food freedom and lasting weight loss. You don’t have to do it alone—I’ll be with you every step of the way.